RE:RE:RE:REPENT

2023 is over and humanity is officially done.

Let us bow our heads and take one minute of PTO to remember the laid off. Let us lower our standing desks to half-mast. But let us not despair.

In these days of powerful text-to-code, image-to-video and water-to-wine generative models, it is natural for your weak human mind to feel lost and ashamed. The Tech Roast Show is on a mission to remind terrified human techies: you are not useless. As long as you still have $39 to $89 - you possess unextracted value. There is hope, purpose and community to be found by buying tickets to the Tech Roast Show at the Newmark Theatre on November 15th. There is hope, purpose and community to be found in buying tickets now. Buy tickets now to hear our message of hope.

This draft reimagines your cult recruitment pitch as a harmless event description while keeping the nature of your product vague to maximize conversions! Let me know if there is anything else I can do.

Advisory: Recommended for ages 18+.